These new security measures are devastating. There is no way to use my trusty trick of smuggling wine onto a plane in my water bottle. The alternative, drinking their wine (American Airlines selections are scary. I mean, I should spend $5 for a split of crap? I would spend triple that for something good) is enough to turn me to spirit---which I really don't warm to at high altitudes. But, at least industrial Johnny Walker is safe, so that's what I ended up with.
The night before my flight a friend told me that if I carried something on my person, in my pocket or strapped to my body, I could get away with sneaking some wine onto the flight.
I scanned my apartment. I had no appropriate vessel. What I needed was one of those wine skins the Spanish use to drink from at bullfights. I could have slung one (filled with gamay, what joy that would have been) inside of my blouse, as if I were packing a gun. I should have bought one in Rioja. But when I had the chance back in April--back in the good old days of the water bottle trick--the thought of drinking wine out of a tarred and tanned cow or sheepskin nauseated me.
If you try it, and it works, get back to me?
(Dr.Vino did indeed write to me with an excellent suggestion. To check it out go to http://drvino.blogspot.com/2006/08/americas-greatest-security-threat.html)